Critical response
Paramount decided not to screen the film for print critics before its release and wanted to focus on internet critics. On Rotten Tomatoes, the film has an approval rating of 33% based on 166 reviews, with an average rating of 4.60/10. The website's critics consensus reads, "While fans of the Hasbro toy franchise may revel in a bit of nostalgia, G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra is largely a cartoonish, over-the-top action fest propelled by silly writing, inconsistent visual effects, and merely passable performances." On Metacritic, the film has a weighted average score of 32 out of 100, based on 25 critics, indicating "generally unfavorable" reviews. Audiences polled by CinemaScore gave the film an average grade of "B+" on an A+ to F scale.
One of the many complaints made by fans was that the film did not relate to the G.I. Joe franchise. G4tv.com stated that, "[the studio] actually went out of their way to butcher the G.I. Joe mythos in favor of derivative storyline devices." They cited the Baroness, who was changed from an East European noble in the comics to Duke's brainwashed ex-girlfriend in the film.
Dan Jolin of Empire magazine commented that it was "Bond without the style and Team America without the bellylaughs". The Daily Telegraph reviewer said, "The taint of cruddiness extends everywhere in this joyless stinker." James Berardinelli said the characters were "as plastic as the toys that inspired them" and considered Tatum "wooden" and that his character was "more animated in sequences when he is rendered by special effects than when being portrayed by Tatum". Roger Ebert described that "there is never any clear sense in the action of where anything is in relation to anything else". Chuck Wilson of The Village Voice criticized the dialogue and described the underwater battle as "absurdly overproduced, momentarily diverting, and then instantly forgettable". Manohla Dargis of The New York Times considered the plot "at once elemental and incomprehensible", and Peter Travers of Rolling Stone thought that, despite the high budget, the special effects "look shockingly crappy; the Eiffel Tower appears to be destroyed by some green slime left over from the Ghostbusters films". Reviewers also criticized the film for the scientific impossibility of sinking ocean ice.
Matthew Leyland from Total Film called it "a throwaway blast of solid, stupid fun" and gave it three out of five stars, particularly praising Joseph Gordon-Levitt's performance as the treacherous Cobra Commander. Sister publication SFX called the film "dumb and dopey, with plenty of bumpy bits" and that "GI Joe has a genuine cliffhanger charm, especially when the last act becomes a whole string of pulp plot twists. The ending screams 'To Be Continued'; we could do worse.", finally awarding the score of three stars out of five.
Christopher Monfette of IGN also gave the film a positive review, saying "This is an adult's interpretation of a childhood phenomenon, and if you're willing to give it a shot, one suspects that you'll find yourself entertained enough to give your best, "Yo, Joe!" He gave the film three and a half out of five stars. Betsy Sharkey of the Los Angeles Times criticized the excessive flashbacks, but praised the action scenes and design, and considered that Marlon Wayans "steals the show". Dan Kois of The Washington Post describing it as "loudest, flashiest, silliest and longest blockbuster in a summer full of long, silly, flashy, loud blockbusters" thought it was "as polished and entertaining as war-mongering toy commercials get".
Cast members Eccleston, Tatum and Miller have been critical of the film in the years since its release. Eccleston stated "Working on something like GI Joe was horrendous. I just wanted to cut my throat every day" and admitted he regretted taking the role primarily for the financial reward. Tatum, in an interview with Howard Stern, said he hated the film, revealing he was pushed into doing the film as to fulfill a three-picture deal he had signed with Paramount. "The script wasn't any good," said Tatum but expressed relief that it could have been worse. Miller, in an interview with Forbes, stated "I'm sorry," she said as soon as I mentioned I had seen not only the first movie but also the companion piece. "You saw both of them? Wait, there was a second one? Well, they didn't bring me back." "There are roles in those kinds of things that would be fun and things that I think my kid would like. I just haven't been offered that yet. I would be open to it. I know what I can do now, and I know what I can't do," she mused. "I shouldn't have played a villain in a comic book because I'm just not that villainous or tall or strong. I am internally, of course, but I couldn't fire a gun without blinking. I'm not a particularly physically threatening presence. The whole thing was a bit of a disaster from start to finish."
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